Progress update

I am 50% effaced and dilated 1 cm. So hopefully I won't be in labor too long. I want that drug to work quickly & get this little boy here & safe.

We now have 14 days until induction.

I missed my own anniversary

I just realized that I have been posting on this blog for a year. I wonder if anyone has gotten anything out of it. I really have no idea if more than 1 person actually reads this. But I continue to post. Maybe out of desperation to not explode with worry. Not like it eliminates the worry but maybe somehow misdirects it.

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I have spent most of the morning re-reading blogs of infertiles that have become parents & I realized I'm not such a freak after all. Sure I have come across a few that still feel infertile but embraced the fact that they were having a real live baby. But for the most part even up to the point where their squirming babies were put in their arms it still didn't feel real to them. They still had a fear that something could still go wrong even during delivery.

I really do wonder if my fear will ever go away. My husband thinks I will have a chair next to the crib so I can watch him sleep. I can't say he's not close to being right. But I'm assuming at some point I'll need to eat & sleep. I can only hope that I can trust my angel care monitor. (yes I have that monitor that goes under the crib mattress & can detect if no movement , even breathing, has not occurred within 20 seconds)

My husband has been doing a little internet reading on induction & managed to stumble upon stillbirths. Now he's an overly nervous neurotic who has been checking on the baby's kicks about 10+ times a day. He never realized that something could go so wrong this late in the game. Um why do you think I still check the baby's heartbeat 3x a day!? Now he's reading up on inducing labor. He now wants this kid out....NOW! He had all these ideas of how to induce labor last night. This , however , is very funny to me because we have been so terrified of something going wrong we have only had sex 4x since I've been pregnant. The last time being when I was like 18 weeks pregnant. Last week I could have promised the world & my husband wouldn't touch me with a 10 foot pole. Last night I had to pry his hands off of me. I did learn one very valuable lesson, the idea of nipple stimulation to bring on contractions is so damn true! I could never do that for 15 minutes on each side like the midwives say. The 2 minutes my husband cornered me brought on the most powerful braxton hicks! I had to draw an invisible line on the family room floor & threaten him if he dare pass it.

I have my 2nd to last appointment tomorrow. Hopefully I have had some progress. My cervix was already soft last week so maybe we'll have some effacement & possibly some dilation this week. I'm only hoping for some progress to ensure I won't have some crazy 30 hour labor with meds to ripen the cervix & then meds to start labor. I'm really hoping I can just have the labor starting meds & skip the 12 hour cervix prep stage.


That's all for today. I'll update on Friday with cervical changes.

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As of today we have 15 days until induction.

Pictures of the nursery

So there it is. A little packed right now because I refuse to let anything baby leave this room. I really have to stop being such a freak!

BTW: 17 days to go until induction!

We have a date!

I have an official induction date! I am scheduled to be induced on March 8th. I feel so good having a day. I just want him out & safely in my arms. I don't hate being pregnant. I actually marvel in every movement, squirm or hiccup. I just wish I could have enjoyed it more. I've been so terrified of something going wrong...it has taken some of the joy & excitement out of it.

My husband is excited but was hoping they would induce me on Saturday the 10th so they could share a birthday. But he's now looking forward to watching ACC tournament with his son. (It starts on the 8th.)

My mother is beside herself. I think she has burned up every phone line from here to New York sharing the news. Southwest Airlines had better get some extra help soon, my family will be on the phone booking tickets to be here! That's the one good & bad drawback about being Italian. We are always in each others business & up each others ass!

I can't believe I know what day my son will be born. It just amazes me. I have waited so very long for this child. I can't believe that I could actually have him in my arms in 21 days!