Complications

I find it amazing that I couldn't do getting pregnant right & now I can't do pregnant right.

Let's due a brief recap....1)Failed the gestational diabetes test. Have to have the 3 hour. Fuck, shit, piss.
2)On the phone 5 times with the on call doc in extreme pain...pre term labor? who knows....just head to labor & delivery asap. Several stressful hours later I have my diagnosis...kidney stones! I am given the option to be admitted to have IV fluids pushed along with pain meds & the promise to hopefully be out before xmas or pain meds, drink lots of water & come back to the hospital on xmas eve for a re-check. I of course chose option home. I regretted this decision about 45 minutes after we left the hospital. I cannot even begin to describe the pain.
3)Xmas eve re-check...stress test fine, little boy fine, blood pressure bad, protein in urine bad. Doc gleefully tells me if my labs come back abnormal I will be admitted until this kid is born. Luckily labs come back normal.
4)Failed 3 hour gestational diabetes test. Fuck,shit,piss.
5)Regular weekly check-up. Blood pressure bad, bad, bad. Now have to go to the office twice a week.

So in short I have gestational diabetes & preeclampsia. I'll be 29 weeks on Saturday. I am on strict bedrest. I have to keep this kid in at least another 3 weeks. I would prefer 7 or 8. I need to have very close monitoring to ensure I don't develop HELLP or eclampsia.

Man I feel like such a failure.

Week 3 on bedrest

Went to the doc yesterday. I still have high blood pressure but no edema. We drew some more HELLP blood work to keep an eye on the preeclampsia. I'll be having an ultrasound next week to check on the placenta previa.

I was supposed to have my gestational diabetes test yesterday but I forgot to drink the orange syrup. I'm a real piece of work, my current job is to incubate this kid to the best of my ability & I forget to take a test for him. Yup I'm gonna be a great mom!

This Saturday starts the 3rd trimester. I'm excited & scared & maybe even a little depressed to get to this milestone. I'm excited because I am so close to finally holding this little boy in my arms. I'm scared because so much can still go wrong. I could go rapidly down hill & this baby may or may not make it if he was born tomorrow. And I'm a little depressed because I have spent this entire pregnancy in such fear. I haven't been able to enjoy it because I was always so afraid of losing this baby. I'm still worried now. I can, with all honesty, say that if something were to happen to this baby today...I would never recover. Never.

Another unexpected update

Well it looks like I might be home for good. Nothing new on the placenta previa, but I now have high blood pressure & am spilling protein in my urine. Yup the very beginning of preeclampsia. I am now keeping my feet up or laying on my left side as much as possible. I have got to keep this kid in here until at least 32 weeks. That's 6 1/2 weeks I have to keep him safe in utero. I am having to go to the doc at least once a week, provided nothing changes. If things get bad...Hospital bedrest on steroids for the baby's lungs to mature faster. My husband is a nervous wreck. I'm trying to convince him that there is no need to worry until the doc says worry.

I have my gestational diabetes test next week. Please let me pass that. I think I'm all filled up with complications for now.

Not the update you were expecting...

I had my appointment on Wednesday of last week. My little boy looked great. I still have placenta previa but the doc isn't worried. So I finally decided to kinda sorta... Relax.

Thursday morning I'm at work minding my own business when my always full bladder came calling. Now picture me in stall with a wad of toilet paper covered in blood. Not the spotting kind either...The period kind. Panic then ensues. I call the doc & my husband. Less than 30 minutes later my blood pressure being taking at the ob office is making the nurse stroke out. My placenta previa decided to show it's ugly face & I am now on bedrest. My little boy is just fine & seems totally oblivious to what's going on. I go back on Wednesday to see what the plan is.

I have just one little fact that I will be explaining to the doc. And that is he had better be damn sure we are doing everything we can to save this baby. There will be no saying you can always have another baby. There are no second chances for me.