Nervous

I am sitting here trying not to vomit on my computer keyboard. I can't honestly say it's morning sickness. If I had to wager a guess, I'd say nerves. I leave here in 1 hour & 15 minutes to get my husband for my appointment. I don't even want to go. I like living in denial. For now, I'm pregnant, I may not be in a matter of hours. I have read both mine & my husbands horoscope...And they look bad! I wonder if I should put any faith in them? When they're good I so want to believe, when they suck I think what a crock of shit.

I am so scared. My little dream of giving birth in March seems so unreachable now. I have begged every god I can think of to make this happen for us. Please oh please oh please let this baby be alive & in the right place.